Home | How It Works | Stats Login | Register         Go Back                 Case Posted on October 9, 2019 6:20 pm Add to Favorites HuByGu Reps: 102 Death of a Student's Parent A student of mine just lost their father suddenly. They are typically very well-behaved and eager to learn. Since the passing, this student has had many outburst and is defiant. I feel bad punishing this student because I don't want to cause them any more distress. I can't continue to have this student misbehave, but I also don't want to hurt their feelings. This is a new situation for me and any help would be appreciated.                 Submit a Possible Solution Please read response(s) below (if any) before posting your solution.                 Solution 1 Posted October 9, 2019 9:48 pm Samantha Rey Reps: 205 I would first pull the student aside and privately let them know that you are there for them if they need anything. Then I would come up with a breaks system, where if they get distraught or frustrated, they can choose to go to the bathroom, get water, or go pop in on a favorite teacher to help alleviate the stress they are feeling. Utilize them for errands, taking an "important folder" to the office or organizing the book shelf at the back of the room. Create a situation in which they feel helpful andare actively doing something they can control. They feel a loss of control so do something that gives it back to them. Hope this helps! :) Votes: +44 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Janson Gunn Reps: 210 I agree with this solution for the situation.   Posted on: February 23, 2020 11:53 pm Add a Comment                 Solution 2 Posted October 11, 2019 1:07 pm ubeBaz Reps: 206 The loss of anyone is difficult and everyone grieves differently. I would not punish the student but make sure the student is aware that you are there to help them as well as counselors and other resources. In this time im sure the student is not worried about school as depending on the relationship with their father the students entire world has been torn apart. Allow some time for healing and just keep helping the student and possibly reach out to mom or other guardian to ensure they are aware. Votes: +11 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution VuXypu Reps: 100 I would suggest talking to the students privately. Let them know if they need anything or recommend visiting the school counselor. It may be helpful to create system to help the student de-stress or calm down.   Posted on: October 12, 2019 2:37 am Add a Comment                 Solution 3 Posted October 13, 2019 12:50 pm uvyDeN Reps: 100 I would have a talk with the student about the situation. Let them know you are there for them. Talk to the guidance counselor and try to set aside a few independent errands for the student so they can have some alone time. Votes: +7 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 4 Posted October 10, 2019 5:16 pm hymagy Reps: 201 I would talk to the student individually when other students are busy doing other work or are out of the classroom. I would want the student to feel safe when talking to me about the situation. I would also offer the student to talk to the school counselor if they want to talk to someone else about the situation. If the behavior continues after talking to the student I would go by the rules and procedures that are set in place. Votes: +7 / -1 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 5 Posted October 13, 2019 4:31 pm aBytyZ Reps: 100 Just be there for the student as a support system, this will be a tough time for the student so be patient with them. Have the school counselor get involved as well, the student needs love and support. Votes: +3 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 6 Posted February 24, 2021 3:35 pm Anastasia Stampoulis Reps: 102 I too lost my father at a young age and it is something that is very traumatic situation. I do not think the student is behaving intentionally, but as you said the behaviors cannot continue. I would show the student a great deal of patience also I would suggest they see the school counselor if possible. They would be great at assisting the student during this difficult time. Votes: +3 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 7 Posted February 24, 2020 2:06 am Samantha Mayhew Reps: 100 Communicate to the student that you are there for them and will be there if they need to talk. Tell them that although they are going through something right now, they are not allowed to act defiantly in the classroom and go against the classroom rules. These outbursts are probably due to an influx in emotion, so give them the opportunity to go to a "safe place" in the classroom when they are feeling overwhelmed. Instead of having an outburst that disrupts others, let them go to to a spot in the room to gather their emotions and join the class again. Obviously, this isn't something that can't be in their safe space all day but hopefully they get back in the groove of things and know that you care. Also, have them get in touch with the guidance counselor to help with the grief. Votes: +2 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 8 Posted October 12, 2019 3:48 pm emetub Reps: 311 I would talk to the student one on one and I would also seek out the help of the school guidance counselor. The counselor will be able to offer some more one on one time for the student. Votes: +1 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 9 Posted October 19, 2020 2:58 am aQyXyJ Reps: 105 As somebody who went through this, giving the student support and treating them more gently was the best solution for me. This is an enormous life changing and traumatizing experience. School should not add more stress. Votes: +1 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 10 Posted February 21, 2020 3:31 pm Nicole Morris Reps: 205 Allow the of share personal feelings and express caring and concern, but it should be kept brief. Keep the focus on the child who is grieving and give them plenty of space and time to talk. Votes: +1 / -3 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 11 Posted October 13, 2019 5:34 pm aQamen Reps: 100 This would be an extremely sensitive situation to resolve. Maybe the guidance counselor could help and become more involved. If the student is having a bad day than the counselor can be an extra adult for the student to talk to. Also, discuss the problem with the other parent in a very respectful way. Patience would be key because this is a life altering tragedy. Votes: +0 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 12 Posted April 17, 2022 1:41 am aDaVyD Reps: 100 I would first let the student know that you are there for them during their time of need. I would explain to the student that although you understand their recent struggle, it is important for them to behave positively. If there are mental health resources available at the school, I would suggest that the students speaks with them to help process their loss. Votes: +0 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 13 Posted April 25, 2022 5:14 pm sanuRa Reps: 201 This case is near and dear to me because I have experienced this. It is important to give this student time to heal from this traumatizing experience. I would ask for the guidance counselor to come into the classroom to speak to students and give them a safe space to express their emotions. Votes: +0 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 14 Posted October 17, 2022 3:10 am J.J. Nolt Reps: 101 I would first begin by talking to the administration about what could be done. Furthermore, I would have a conversation privately with the student and talk extensively while being a listening ear to the student. I would talk to the student repeatedly and make sure that we hear eachother. Votes: +0 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 15 Posted February 20, 2023 10:05 pm Caitlin Ferland Reps: 101 Children cannot process grief the way adults do. Pain and sadness often are exhibited as anger and frustration. I would offer the guidance department as a healthy alternate to outbursts and definitely talk to the student and tell them you are there for them if they want to talk. More than likely the issue will get better with time. Votes: +0 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 16 Posted February 26, 2023 8:30 pm adeSah Reps: 201 I would defintely try and avoid punishment. they are lashing out and you seem to know that this is an aberration. Try and pull the student aside to empathize with them, and try to avoid situations that are triggering whatever trauma is inflicting the outbursts. I would also see if there is a counselor or other staff professional who may be able to help the student. Votes: +0 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 17 Posted March 2, 2023 2:54 am yhuNar Reps: 103 It may be helpful to sit with this student one on one and have a conversation because they are going through some really big emotions. They may just need to be heard and might need some extra love and attention. Or someone to vent to or possibly get a counselor involved to help with misbehaviors. Votes: +0 / -0 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Solution 18 Posted October 13, 2019 6:07 pm Keith Evans Reps: 204 This is a very tragic case. Unfortunately you don't want to be too hard on the child, but you also need to show that you are still the adult and the child must still respect what you say. It is important that as the teacher to explain to the child that their behavior is not acceptable, and that if it continues there will be consequences. Votes: +0 / -7 This Solution Is Useful   This Solution Is Not Useful   Comments posted for this solution Add a Comment                 Submit a Possible Solution Please read response(s) below (if any) before posting your solution.