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  Case: Don't Hold Hands
Ade and Elsa are two 7th grade girls from Indonesia who joined our school couple months ago. I teach them Physical Science. They have well-developed English skills. Although they have an accent, they can communicate with teachers and fellow students. I am very sensitive to the needs of newly-arrived immigrant students, so I paid close attention when I heard rumors from other students about them. Students started spreading that Ade and Elsa were in a lesbian relationship. Apparently Ade and Elsa heard about the rumors; they came to me in tears. I asked them to tell me what was going on. What I found out was very interesting. Ade and Elsa have known each other since they were small children and they have always been best friends. Their families decided to move to the US together. Their fathers applied for jobs in the same company. They both received offers and moved together. Ade and Elsa were excited about going to the same school in US and continuing their friendship. In Indonesia, same-gender friends holding hands is very common and indicates friendship. When children at our school saw Ade and Elsa holding hands they thought that Ade and Elsa were in a lesbian relationship. I have to do something about this. I see two options before me: I will explain to the children in my classes that friends holding hands in some cultures is completely normal, or I will tell Ade and Elsa to not hold hands to avoid these rumors. The second option seems culturally insensitive, but if Ade and Elsa continue holding hands, rumors will continue even if I explain to my students the cultural side of their friendship. What should I do? If you have an original solution to this issue, please advice.
Solution: (Rates are posted for this solution!)
I think I would try two approaches to this issue. First, I would, possibly with the assistance of the counselor because of bullying issues, ensure that the two girls understand the cultural meaning of hand-holding in the US. It is possible that the girls do not understand why other students are perceiving their actions the way they are. I would tell the girls that, due to the other students' culture, they are having this reaction. The girls are free to behave in any way that does not violate school behavior rules, but this is how others in the US may perceive their behavior.

Second, this would be a good foundation for a lesson on cultural norms and practices. Examples are handshakes, high-fives, table manners, and other routines. Comparisons could be made between norms in the US and in other countries. The goal of this lesson would be to expose other students to practices in other countries. The other students are limited by their culture, so it is up to me as the teacher to expose my students to other cultures around the world. Hopefully, by educating students on other cultural norms, they would be less likely to jump to conclusions based on such actions.

I think an important aspect of this is to be aware of any bullying that may spring out of this. Rumors such as this could get out of hand quickly, and Ade and Elsa need to be supported by school personnel. Anyone perpetuating this bullying should be disciplined according to school policy.