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  Case: Death of a Student's Parent
A student of mine just lost their father suddenly. They are typically very well-behaved and eager to learn. Since the passing, this student has had many outburst and is defiant. I feel bad punishing this student because I don't want to cause them any more distress. I can't continue to have this student misbehave, but I also don't want to hurt their feelings. This is a new situation for me and any help would be appreciated.
Solution: (Rates are posted for this solution!)
I would first pull the student aside and privately let them know that you are there for them if they need anything. Then I would come up with a breaks system, where if they get distraught or frustrated, they can choose to go to the bathroom, get water, or go pop in on a favorite teacher to help alleviate the stress they are feeling. Utilize them for errands, taking an "important folder" to the office or organizing the book shelf at the back of the room. Create a situation in which they feel helpful andare actively doing something they can control. They feel a loss of control so do something that gives it back to them. Hope this helps! :)
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: nice
Rated On: October 10, 2019 1:31 pm
Rated By: pagyDa
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: The death of a parent can leave a child feeling hopeless, lost, angry, and abandoned. They didn't have any control over losing their parent which can trigger so many different emotions. They might not know how to express their feelings or emotions so they act out. So, I agree to give the child an opportunity to feel like they are in control over a task. It is important for a child to feel like they have control over a situation especially after the death of a parent.
Rated On: October 10, 2019 9:59 pm
Rated By: Myria Coure
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: Great.
Rated On: October 11, 2019 12:13 pm
Rated By: eVuZuR
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: Yes, let him know that you care and are aware of his feeling, it will be easier for him to let you know when he needs a break from the classroom.
Rated On: October 12, 2019 4:07 am
Rated By: tabape
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I agree with the solutions presented in this post. Reaching out the student and offering support is a great first step. I also like the idea of establishing a breaks system where the student can regroup if they are overcome with feelings of sadness, grief or anxiety.
Rated On: October 13, 2019 1:09 am
Rated By: yZedem
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I agree. This is when the student needs the most support and help.
Rated On: October 13, 2019 11:53 pm
Rated By: GeQapy
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I would do the best I could to help this student and not want to add more stress. Great explanation.
Rated On: October 14, 2019 2:46 am
Rated By: Brittany
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I ag
Rated On: October 15, 2019 4:58 pm
Rated By: uWaMyB
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I like this solution. I like that you mentioned they feel out of control, so they may need to a specific role to help balance their mind for the time being.
Rated On: October 16, 2019 12:41 am
Rated By: uPuhuP
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: The practice of a breaks system is a great idea along with keeping them active within the class.
Rated On: October 16, 2019 11:36 am
Rated By: LeDyqa
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I agree I think this is a good solution, it shows the student you care about them and hopefully will eliminate the outbursts.
Rated On: October 18, 2019 3:04 am
Rated By: HuraHu
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I agree with this solution I too lost my father at a young age and so I empathize. It's tough situation on both ends, but those solutions are great.
Rated On: October 19, 2019 4:43 pm
Rated By: Anastasia Stampoulis
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: this is what I would do
Rated On: October 20, 2019 12:30 am
Rated By: abuPuj
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This is a good idea to help distract the student from everything going on.
Rated On: October 20, 2019 5:43 am
Rated By: Alec Muir
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This is a wonderful solution! I had something similar happen to myself and my teachers would allow me to take breaks to help keep myself in check. I had a little laminated note that all I had to do was show my teacher and I would silently leave the classroom if it was an appropriate time.
Rated On: October 20, 2019 6:08 pm
Rated By: uQyvaQ
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: That helps alot
Rated On: October 21, 2019 2:05 am
Rated By: seJuQa
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I agree, letting them know you care and want to help can possibly open the child's eyes.
Rated On: October 21, 2019 2:09 am
Rated By: aLaGuv
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I think this is a great way to help the student. Showing them you are there to help them and giving them space to express their feelings is the best thing to do.
Rated On: February 19, 2020 5:40 pm
Rated By: Torii Podmokly
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This solution really takes the student's emotions into account and accepts the fact that humans grieve and in their own individual way.
Rated On: February 20, 2020 3:41 am
Rated By: emaXub
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I would do exactly this!
Rated On: February 21, 2020 2:01 pm
Rated By: Amber Hyatt
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: good
Rated On: February 23, 2020 10:44 pm
Rated By: ejyqeq
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: When I was in 6th grade I lost a parent and my teacher took suggestions for a thoughtful gift for my family and my class came up with a "rice bowl". filled with soft beans and everyone in the class brought in a tiny trinket to put in. it is used to be a meditative tool and made me feel very considered and supported by my class. After I came back from school I got a lot of support as well.

This idea of keeping a student extra busy with simple tasks and daily errands and breaks is a great idea too
Rated On: February 23, 2020 11:43 pm
Rated By: Vanessa Tuliau
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I think this would be the best possible solution.
Rated On: February 23, 2020 11:52 pm
Rated By: Janson Gunn
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This is a very hard subject to deal with but given the tragic circumstances i think this is a great solution.
Rated On: February 24, 2020 2:36 am
Rated By: ynepyH
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I think this a great idea. This allows the student to healthily and productively release their anger and sadness. It is in the best interest of the teacher to support this student through their grieving.
Rated On: February 26, 2020 12:19 am
Rated By: Emily Malley
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I think this would be very helpful for the student!
Rated On: July 1, 2020 2:32 am
Rated By: yzubyz
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: If I were in this situation, I would exactly do this.
Rated On: October 8, 2020 10:26 pm
Rated By: DuBuJy
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This is a creative and compassionate solution for this very difficult situation.
Rated On: October 9, 2020 11:22 pm
Rated By: vydeDe
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: If I were in this situation, I would exactly do this
Rated On: October 15, 2020 9:16 pm
Rated By: Angela Mitchell
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I love this solution. I think the part about giving them a break is super important.
Rated On: October 17, 2020 4:07 pm
Rated By: aqyZuR
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: Yes, I agree this is the best solution. Talking to the student one on one will improve the students behavior, and creating positive situations and the ability to take breaks is a great idea!
Rated On: October 19, 2020 1:42 am
Rated By: yseHez
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: Yes, this is the best solution. Support is what the student needs.
Rated On: October 19, 2020 2:58 am
Rated By: aQyXyJ
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This sounds like a very good solution.
Rated On: March 7, 2021 3:10 am
Rated By: juRuqa
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I agree with this solution. those are easy ways to help a student under distress
Rated On: March 7, 2021 9:39 pm
Rated By: turyhu
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: agreed
Rated On: October 25, 2021 8:26 pm
Rated By: TyNede
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This is a great solution that makes the student feel more comfortable in the classroom and helps distract them from negative feelings.
Rated On: October 28, 2021 7:01 pm
Rated By: aRaPuB
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This is such a great solution for a tough issue. I would do exactly this.
Rated On: October 30, 2021 4:30 pm
Rated By: anubeM
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I think this is good as you never want to embarrass a student, but also giving the student the opportunity to change the behaviors
Rated On: November 1, 2021 1:03 am
Rated By: yhedyZ
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: I think letting the students know you are there for them is the best thing to do.
Rated On: April 1, 2022 4:13 pm
Rated By: eSysyv
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This is such a great idea! it will also help the student have more trust and be comfortable in the classroom, especially because of their circumstances.
Rated On: April 4, 2022 3:50 am
Rated By: ahuNaj
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: i agree
Rated On: April 17, 2022 3:17 am
Rated By: aNabaR
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: Love this response! I may also make contact with the guidance counselor to make them aware of issue and to provide any insight if possible.
Rated On: November 8, 2022 12:53 am
Rated By: etaWeW
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: Very good way to handle this
Rated On: February 23, 2023 1:27 pm
Rated By: yraXuG
 
     
     
  Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) Yes
The suggested solution is relevant to the case Yes
The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement Yes
The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue Yes
The suggested solution is original Yes
Comments: This is exactly what I would do. The student needs something that is healthy to control and needs to feel supported and valued.
Rated On: March 27, 2023 8:49 pm
Rated By: eHaSaN