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Case: Her Parents or Her Boyfriend
As a high school teacher, somehow I always hated when students opened up to me and shared with me things that they could not share with anyone else. It was one of those things again when Emily, a White 11th grader, wanted to talk to me. She said she wanted to talk to me about something important and that she needed my help. I am a caring teacher, so I listened. She has been dating an African American student named Willy and she is really in love with him. Willy loves her too. They want to go to the same college and get married after graduating. The problem is Emily has not been able to tell her family about this relationship. She said that her father is not very fond of Black people, and that there is no way he would approve this relationship. She asked me to talk to her parents. I told her that I could not do it. She, then said, she would either kill herself or run away from her house if somebody did not convince her parents. I have to do something, but what? Please advice.
Solution: (Rates are posted for this solution!)
This is a situation that sounds like you need to get the help of a school counselor. I agree with you that it is not your place to try to convince her parents that she is doing the right thing. I think it is good that you listened to her problem but there must be a line drawn between school and home. Maybe after speaking with the school counselor, the both of you could call her parents and just explain that she is threatening suicide.They may not even know there is an issue. Also, both of you could talk with the student and give her some strategies on how she could handle her problem differently and the effects it would have on her family and her boyfriend if she committed suicide. |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I think it's a good idea to talk to the counselor about all this, and to also talk to the parents about the problems also. |
Rated On: February 27, 2015 4:51 pm |
Rated By: LeqeHe |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: This solution would provide the best protection for both teacher and student. |
Rated On: March 2, 2015 4:54 am |
Rated By: SeRuru |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: This is a great solution and one that I would use in my classroom! |
Rated On: March 2, 2016 5:43 am |
Rated By: uBybuz |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I feel like this is the best response to the situation without overstepping one's bounds as a teacher. |
Rated On: October 16, 2016 3:05 am |
Rated By: uvuVas |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I think it would be best letting her family know that she is threatening with suicide. The solution is well stated. |
Rated On: October 17, 2016 3:28 am |
Rated By: Raven B |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: Getting the guidance counselor involved would be a great idea. |
Rated On: October 19, 2016 1:41 am |
Rated By: Elisa Perez |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: This is all sound advice which looks at the many options for moving forward. |
Rated On: March 6, 2017 5:24 pm |
Rated By: jyHyHy |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: oh my goodness. what a situation. good answer |
Rated On: October 16, 2017 2:12 am |
Rated By: yReNyp |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I agree. It is important to take her threat seriously and to alert a councilor. |
Rated On: February 21, 2018 6:37 pm |
Rated By: uDyJeZ |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I would immediately involve the guidance counselor for this situation. |
Rated On: February 26, 2018 1:52 am |
Rated By: medega |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: If I were in this situation, I would exactly do this |
Rated On: February 28, 2018 12:31 am |
Rated By: agedyQ |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: Good idea. |
Rated On: October 9, 2018 1:40 am |
Rated By: pagyDa |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I agree it's not the teacher's position to take care of this although they can help by sending the girl to see her guidance counselor. The guidance counselor will then help the girl and do what she thinks is right for her. |
Rated On: October 14, 2019 7:11 pm |
Rated By: aHaQaj |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: Inappropriate response to a dangerous situation, it is always better to involve someone more qualified for the situation. Simply trying to figure it out by yourself could lead to dire consequences. It would also be a good idea, after the situation is hopefully resolved, to consult with the guidance counselor about the strategies and procedures that can be used in such a situation in the future. |
Rated On: October 19, 2019 3:30 am |
Rated By: maVeqy |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I think this is a good, caring solution. |
Rated On: February 22, 2020 3:37 pm |
Rated By: Michelle Cummings |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: Bringing in outside help is always a good idea |
Rated On: February 24, 2020 2:20 am |
Rated By: yHuDav |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: good idea |
Rated On: October 18, 2020 2:48 am |
Rated By: VePuWu |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I agree with this solution. |
Rated On: October 31, 2021 3:23 pm |
Rated By: Pearl Reberkenny |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I agree with this solution, talking to the guidance counselor could be the best solution. |
Rated On: April 3, 2022 2:12 pm |
Rated By: gupeVy |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: agreed. |
Rated On: November 13, 2022 8:22 pm |
Rated By: buTuDe |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: I agree, this situation calls for a professional in counseling. Although it is important that we as teachers show care for our students, there is a fine line between caring for them and getting involved inappropriately. |
Rated On: February 24, 2023 6:07 pm |
Rated By: eHaSaN |
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The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
No
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Comments: Overall I feel this solution was most appropriate considering the fragility of the situation. It is best to inform those best at aiding in a mental health crisis to better guide the situation. It i beneficial for teachers to be there for their students but there is the boundary of them being a facet of the school, not the students personal life. |
Rated On: July 23, 2023 9:37 pm |
Rated By: zyzuDy |
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Rating
The suggested solution is respectful of the individual (student) |
Yes
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The suggested solution is relevant to the case |
Yes
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The suggested solution is reasonable (easy) for the teacher to implement |
Yes
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The suggested solution is likely to solve the problem/issue |
Yes
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The suggested solution is original |
Yes
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Comments: Great solution, I agree it is necessary to bring outside help into this problem |
Rated On: October 7, 2023 12:54 am |
Rated By: bequja |
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